


It's Real

by ForgottenChesire



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Dreams, M/M, Wedding, canon compliant character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-27
Updated: 2018-03-27
Packaged: 2019-04-08 18:07:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,022
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14111049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForgottenChesire/pseuds/ForgottenChesire
Summary: He doesn’t remember the drive to the church. Not the stops to pick up his mum and Daisy both beaming, laughing, happy as they join him. Nor picking up Jamal and Ryan, leaning on each other and oozing contentment. It’s just one moment driving and then the next the Wedding March is playing loud and proud. His hand is on Harry’s arm. Like a proper bride, though he ain’t blushing or a virgin, he’s lead down to Morven. Daisy skips ahead of them, her dress bouncing with each step, the flowers drifting down slowly. This is real. And then he sports Agent Tequila and Agent Whiskey. Jason and Elizabeth, smiling and looking so unlike themselves.





	It's Real

Eggsy opens his eyes moments before his alarm clock rings. Excitement flows through his veins. Today is the day! The space beside him on the bed is empty and cold because his lover is a romantic wanker who still believes the rubbish about seeing your spouse before the wedding. The thought of having to shower and eat almost stops him from wiggling out of his bed. He doesn’t want to do those things. He wants to get married. But he does, and it’s likely the fastest shower he’s ever taken… not counting the ones for missions. He even speed brushes his teeth and hair. Grooming done he walks over to the closest. The tuxedo is right there on the hanger, all he has to do is reach out. Touch it.

 

This is real. He’s getting married. He’s marrying one Hamish Morven Darrow today surrounded by family. Eggsy’s hands shake as he reaches out to feel the soft fabric. This is real. The thought keeps repeating over and over in his head. Like an affirmation. This is real. Nervousness is slowly seeping into his giddiness. There is something that is tugging on his mind. A little nagging that the room isn’t right. That something isn’t how it should be.

 

“My dear boy.”

 

The blond turns, shoulders losing tension as he takes in the form of his mentor.

 

“Haz!”

 

The “fight” over Harry had been epic, ending in bruising sex that Eggsy relishes. Morven, Merlin at work and Morven at home never Hamish thank you very much, had wanted Harry as his Best Man. Eggsy, of course, wanted Harry to walk him down the aisle. Traditionality and femininity be damned, it was the one thing Eggsy actual enjoyed during the few weddings he’d been to. Michelle had come up with a perfect solution, Harry would walk him down the aisle before going to stand next to Morven.

 

“How times have I asked you not to call me that?” Harry sighs at him fondly, his one eye sizing Eggsy up approvingly. He always says that and Eggsy always swears he won’t.

 

“Least a hundred times.”

 

With Harry there getting ready is easier. The little voice that keeps trying to draw his attention to things goes quiet. Letting him instead focus on the important things. Like how Ryan and Jamal probably still have bruises from the wrestling match to his Best Man. Like how good the tux feels on his skin. How carefully he nibbles on food to hold him over until the ceremony is finished. They are heading out the door when Harry stops.

 

“Your father would be so happy for you. You’ve grown into such a gentleman.”

 

Eggsy beams, a bounce entering his steps.

 

He doesn’t remember the drive to the church. Not the stops to pick up his mum and Daisy both beaming, laughing, happy as they join him. Nor picking up Jamal and Ryan, leaning on each other and oozing contentment. It’s just one moment driving and then the next the Wedding March is playing loud and proud. His hand is on Harry’s arm. Like a proper bride, though he ain’t blushing or a virgin, he’s lead down to Morven. Daisy skips ahead of them, her dress bouncing with each step, the flowers drifting down slowly. This is real. And then he sports Agent Tequila and Agent Whiskey. Jason and Elizabeth, smiling and looking so unlike themselves. The voice from before is back. It’s screaming in his ear.

 

Morven reaches out and the voice is gone again. God does his husband-to-be look so perfect in his tuxedo. Like sex on legs, God's perfection sent to bless him. The March ends and something else seems to echo in the silence as the priest talks. Morven’s hands are calloused and warm in his. They can’t keep their eyes off each other, waiting for their cue.

 

“Will you take this man to be your husband; to have and to hold. In sickness and in health?”

 

“I will.”

 

The words echo and echo and echo. They reverberate through Eggsy’s bones.

 

“You may kiss the groom.”

 

Morven steps forward eyes gleaming as he leans forward.  _ Click. _ Eggsy freezes. That little sound pecking at his mind. He wants to kiss his husband but he looks down. The wood floors of the church are replaced with the foliage covered jungle floor.

 

“Morven?”

 

His voice doesn’t quake. It doesn’t shake. He looks at Morven, the bald man looking at him so gently. One large hand coming up to cup his face. The voice is back. Screaming. Begging. And that  _ click _ is still bouncing around. This is real. It is. It has to be. That click is fake. It’s fake. Morven just has to kiss him and they can start a new leg of their life together. And then the music that had been a backdrop fires up.  _ Country roads, take me home. To the place, I belong. West Virginia, mountain mamma, take me ho- _

 

**_BOOM!_ **

 

Eggsy wakes with a scream, hand reaching out to the left side of the bed. It’s cold. It’s empty. Morven isn’t here. Morven isn’t here. He rolls onto his side as another clash of thunder goes off overhead. The scent of the flowers from the wedding that wasn’t is still stuck in his nose as he fights off tears. It wasn’t real. It wasn’t real. Morven is gone. Gone. Gone. Gone. He’ll get it together later. When the loss of Morven, of Roxy, of Ryan, isn’t so fresh. He’ll shove his emotions down before he leaves his room. He clings to the jumper he stole from Morven’s office once upon a time. It no longer smells like the amazing man who once wore it but Eggsy can pretend. He can pretend that it was all real, that Morven is out and about instead of sleeping in with his husband. Right now he is going cry. He’s going to mourn. For Ryan, who would have shined. For Roxy, who would have been the Best Man ever. For Morven, for what could have been. He’s going to cry until he falls asleep or his alarm goes off.


End file.
